Monday, October 5, 2015

Tiny thoughts

Just thought I'd poke my head out and say a word or two.  You know, instead of sleeping.

Presently, things are humming along in the life of David at more or less adequate conditions.  One can never tell if a bad day is just around the corner, and I have to take the time to remind myself of all the things I wrote in that affirmational post.  But my days have been mostly good for the past couple of weeks. 

Writing is definitely something that's been giving me pleasure and satisfaction.  I'm happy with how The Secret Egg is developing, even though I haven't quite figured out how it ends yet.  That just means that, for now at least, we get to experience the suspense together!

Actually, that brings me back to something.  A little while ago, I wrote about making peace with the fact that basically nobody reads my writings.  To be honest, sometimes that feels like a lie.  It's not really that liberating to work on something and have it elude the notice of the world completely.  As far as anyone is anxiously awaiting the next installment of The Secret Egg, I may be the only one.  Then once it's done, I get to reread it a few times, compare it to previous efforts, and wait around until I finally gather the energy to tell myself another story.  It's easier than beating myself up for not attracting any feedback, but not nearly as fulfilling as actually getting the attention.

There is another story of sorts in the pipe, though.  I have been working in spare moments on a long narrative poem, in ballad form.  It has a sort of fairy tale setting, with elves and enchantments and other fun elements.  So far it's about a hundred and twenty-some lines, so it's already the longest poem I've made by far.  I have a lot of warm feelings for this effort.  A small handful of people on Tumblr seem intrigued by it too, and that makes me feel good.

With all that said, I thought I'd make a note about my personal life.  I met a girl about a month ago now, who I thought things were going well with.  Unfortunately, after going on a total of two dates with me (both of which were very nice), she left town for a family emergency, and from what she told me she'll be gone until after the new year.  If I'm still available then, she says she'd like to catch up.  That's really heartening, in theory.  But one thing I've had to relearn this year is not to count chickens until they actually pick up the phone and call you.

The thing is, I really like this girl.  We talked quite a bit before meeting the first time, and for all I've learned about her I feel like we're a great match.  I think about her a lot.  We had some poor luck in our timing though, and it's taking all of my positivity to convince myself that I could possibly have a second chance with her in a few months time.  Personal experience doesn't bear out that possibility, though I know I should have faith in the surprises of life.

So what do I do in the meantime?  Well, I guess I keep taking care of myself.  Trying to get healthy and stable, keeping an open heart and mind, learning as much as I can.  Being the best me I can be, as it were.  Ultimately, worrying about things like this is a waste of energy.  Given time, the world will present me with opportunities, and I will take them when I'm ready.

No comments:

Post a Comment